Moments of Joy - Family Dining

Yesterday was a weekday, Thursday to be precise.  Who did I have lunch with?  My wonderful husband and my two beautiful daughters.  Since my husband works out of his home office most days of the week we often have lunch together, but since both of my girls were recovering from illness, they were both home too.  As we tucked into our sandwiches I looked around and my heart swelled a little.  This is the life, I tell you!  I love mealtime together, and it is something we usually do for every meal.  Taking the time to eat together is something that brings me great joy.  I started writing this post, but realized I had written it before on an old blog.  Here it is again for your reading pleasure.

Meals were always an event growing up.  In our tiny Amsterdam home, the table was located smack-dab in the middle of the living room   Pushed towards the wall when not in use, pulled out when needed, the first order of business was always the tablecloth.  The table was already covered in a couple of tablecloths - some sort of oilcloth to protect the table and then covered with a woven cloth with awesome tassels for style.  I love playing with those tassels and if I close my eyes I can still feel them in my fingers.

At mealtime, a cotton cloth would be placed over top of the cloths already on the table.  I remember the table always being soft from the layers of tablecloths.  There was a superstition associated with a clean tablecloth.  A fresh-from-the-wash cloth would inevitably get dirty the first time in use - a gravy drip or a pudding slop.  Then my mother would say that she wouldn't wash it for just one spill and that she intended to wait until it got good and dirty before washing it again.  Of course, nothing would spill on it again and finally it would just get washed anyways.  A clean cloth would be broken out and the first time in use - a spill!

We always ate together at the table.  That was the very important ritual at our house.  We ate family style with plates of bread and toppings at breakfast and lunchtime, bowls of steaming hot food at dinner time.  It made for lots of family time, talking, laughing and enjoying each other.  Oh, the life lessons we learned there!

We did occasionally eat lunch away from the table.  My mom would ask if we wanted "camping bread".  That question was always met with a resounding "yes!" and off she would go to break out that special kind of bread.  Open-faced sandwiches would appear on plates and we would sit in the living room, right beside the dining table (!) and enjoy that incredibly delicious lunch, tasting so much better than when we ate at the table.  Imagine my surprise when I discovered "camping bread" wasn't a special recipe baked up by the baker, just regular bread eaten on our laps!  In the innocence of youth, it was a mystery why it tasted so much better!

Eating at the table for each meal didn't end until my husband and I moved into our first apartment.  We brought a bunch of hand-me-downs with us, including an old table, but I think we ate at it twice and after about a year we got rid of the table.  Our apartment also had a bar that we could have eaten at, we didn't do that even once!  We lived like students, well, I was one, and ate all our meals on our laps.  For five years!  We never invited anyone to dinner because there was no place to eat once we got rid of the table.

One of my greatest joys when we moved into our first house was the delivery of our newly purchased dining room table.   We visited many, many stores, but eventually settled on a beautiful solid maple table with six chairs (I wish I could have justified more chairs and a sideboard, but alas...).  That was 17 years ago and we still have and use that table every day.  For every meal.  The four of us gather and eat together.  We try to wait until everyone is sitting to start eating (sometimes that is hard if you are really, really hungry!)  I have had many happy moments of joy sharing meals at the table with family and friends.  I hope to have many more!

Moments of Joy - Laundry Room

My husband and I bought our house from plans almost 12 years ago.  We knew what we wanted; only one dining area, a big kitchen, a nice view of something other than a neighbour's house, a southern exposure and a main floor laundry.  I wasn't hung up on the number of bedrooms or the size of the place, most new homes had the appropriate number of bathrooms and good flow, nice windows and space for a dishwasher.  We figured we could fix anything necessary over the years because our intention was always to stay for the long haul.  And when we saw the plans for our 1700 square foot bungalow, with its small but practical main floor laundry room, I was sold.  I have never regretted our decision in choosing this house.  And because our home is a bungalow we were able to create a lovely apartment for my mother in our basement, a space that has since morphed into our rec room and office, our old office becoming my business kitchen.  Lots of room for our family of four + poochie.

That beloved little laundry room is located right by the front door.  You can enter it from the front hall or the garage.  I'd like to call it a mudroom, but the truth is, there is no room for mud.  It is crammed full - our 15+ year old washer and dryer (well used and oft repaired), laundry sink and the smallest linen closet you have ever seen.  Within weeks of moving in I hung shelves and hooks in every spot possible and the room is a storage area for all my vases, rags, garbage bags, light bulbs, shoe care, cleaning supplies, extra sponges, clean laundry temporary storage, the never-empty-yet-to-be-sorted-clean-sock basket, boot and shoe overflow area, extra detergents, my gym bag, brooms and mops, heart-rate monitors, goggles and other sport gear, extra reusable grocery bags and our dog's food and water bowls as well as her treats.  I'm okay with all of that.  Everything has its place and when in its place, it is a very full yet organized room.

Unfortunately, when we have company coming, it is also the place for overflow, everything that needs to be out of the way gets dumped in there - unread newspapers, unwashed or unfolded laundry - which is soon mixed up and all deemed dirty again, recycling, recently three boxes filled with old dishes, all things that have been hanging around the house that don't have a home.  When the company arrives the door gets closed and no one knows what is hiding behind there.  But while the stuff goes in, it never really comes out again, and in all honesty, it had been months since I did something about it.  So, this past weekend I took the time to clean up.  It took half a day of sorting, tidying and throwing out, and things looked much, much worse before they got better and really, it's never going to be a beautiful room, but there a good feeling now when I step into this tidy little space.  Just like when I wash the windows or clean the fridge, I want to keep enjoying the new feeling of cleanliness.  To walk in without stumbling with a clear path right to Marley's food dish, to have access to the sink, to know where things are and be able to get at them, to be able to open the dryer door without bumping into something (although usually the dog is in the way, isn't she always?) even to be able to open the garage door without first having to move the boxes of dishes out of the way, it feels light and has brought me more than one moment of joy this week!

Moments of Joy - Seeing Light After the Darkness

Eleven months ago I received an unexpected phone call.  It brought shocking and devastating news - my dear friend of almost 30 years had died suddenly during an overnight visit to the hospital (for pneumonia).  Janis was only 43 years old, happily married, a loving mother of three boys aged 11, 8 and 5, a hugely successful career woman who had a life of travel and a huge network of family, friends and colleagues.  We were all unprepared and shocked by her sudden death.  Janis and I had met on the first day of high school and soon we were best friends, our high school days filled with sleepovers, school activities like music and yearbook and school council and fundraising and travel, talking about our future and our dreams.  One of our high school friends eventually became her husband, and he is also the friend who introduced me to the man who would become my husband, so lots of good times and good memories for all of us.   

We organized a dance-a-thon fundraiser at our local mall back in 1986.

Her death filled me with sadness and disbelief, feelings of helplessness and a loss of control filled my thoughts every day in the weeks and months following her death.  I needed to take more time to appreciate each day, I needed to find the joy in simple things and really learn to appreciate them.

A day together with our families in 2008.

The first time I consciously noticed something simple bringing me joy was a few months ago when I was in the car in a parking lot.  I took the keys out of the ignition and opened the door.  I had left the headlights on and as a warning, the car sang out the sweetest and gentlest song of reminder to me.  It filled me with a sense of happiness that I got to hear that song and thought it was a lovely way to give warning (why couldn't my alarm clock sing such a pretty song?)  I considered writing my feelings down at that moment to remember and appreciate how I felt, but, I didn't and I promptly forgot about it.  Then it happened again a few weeks later and I remembered the sound and the joy it brought me before.  I knew I had to write it down to truly appreciate it and I decided sharing those "Moments of Joy" could benefit more than just me, so I am sharing on this bigger platform with you, my fans and friends from the various corners of the world.  I think a weekly post will force me to look for those moments that bring me joy and I am happy to find moments like these in a world that is sometimes sad and dark.  I would also love to hear about what brings you joy.  There are days when I need all the help I can get!